First off I have to say this is the first time I have written something such as this and I apologize in advance if I offend or ramble at all in this post. I simply feel this is the best way to express my opinions and thoughts on the issues I am going to talk about.
Lately I have been searching fashion inspirations ideas and photos of women with a similar build to myself in hopes I can not only find my sense of style, things I can incorporate into my wardrobe that speak to me and make me feel absolutely wonderful or any other feeling I am trying to emote but to find comfort in my own physique. Thru my searches in the past couple of months I have encountered things posts words that trouble and upset me. I am going to address two main topics
TOPIC ONE----- FAT/CURVY vs SKINNY/HEALTHY
I can not count how many tv segments, blogs, tumblr ,youtube videos, comments on articles I have come across that are referring to what I'll call the opposing sides. Statements such as curves are for real women , shes not curvy shes fat, lose weight, go eat a hamburger, there are just so many and it saddens me greatly to read these. It saddens me because as a species as a society we have allowed the ideas of a few to decide the social standards, to dictate to us what is real and not real to what is accepted as normal and what is not. We have allowed fashion designers photographers and the all mighty photo shop to tell US what we should look like and what we should bust our asses to attain drawing an invisable line dividing sides of what seems like a war. Their are women and men who do their best to stay in shape to eat healthy or are simply naturally slender, their are those who no matter what they do are "heavier" or not the acceptable socially implicated size and those who simply prefer to be that and everything in between. For some odd reason tho there is an on going battle between us over weight over what is attractive what is acceptable. My question is shouldn't it all be?
Fashion and the debate over the size of our butts changes as the times does. In one era full and heavy were what women ,what men wanted to achieve it represented status wealth and beauty. The next era rail thin or petite the new trend the new this is what you should look like. Tan one and fair as snow another. Whats socially acceptable changes like the wind.
My take on it is we are all living breathing human beings we are ALL REAL and we should respect and accept each other as unique individuals to lift one another up not to drag each other down. We should accept that what is considered desirable attainable beautiful is up to each unique person and who are we to say that that is wrong that they are wrong? If someone is comfortable in their own skin despite their size or shape why do we feel the need to to tell them differently they have the right to whom they are and to be able to label them selves as they choose. At the end of the day they are the ones who will look into the mirror and acknowledge the fact of who and what they are. If you don't like who you are then change it to the best of your ability and if you are happy with the size of your ass the color of your hair or your small frame then be you and always remember that others opinions of you are simply put NONE of your business.
SECOND TOPIC- WHATS RIGHT FOR YOUR BODY TYPE BULLSHIT
The second topic and hopefully shorter of the two is the constants bombardment in the fashion world of whats right for your body type/ how to dress the best for your shape crap. In almost every magazine or fashion website I have come across something some bit of "information" of what looks good and or bad on a particular body type what you should chose when shopping for clothing for accessories.
I am in no means what is socially acceptable I have a massive ass and am very busty broad shoulders and after two kids ha! flat stomach yea right not even in my wildest dreams only a plastic surgeon will ever allow me that. I can bust my ass at the gym and eat nothing those facts will never change about my body type. Before my two boys were born( my late teens) I tried to read everything to help me look my best and to hide/accentuate the things that I wanted. You know what I found out? .....I hated the way I looked I didn't like what I saw or what I was told was "best" for me. After I hit my 20s I realized Who the hell is to say what looks good and what doesn't on me I am my best judge. I am the one who says what looks good on me makes me feel better about myself not some fashion designer not some magazine with their opinions or society with theirs. I will wear what makes me ME feel best. If you love it if you feel good in something wear it because I have found as I have gotten older that the only universal flattering thing is confidence if you have that then no ensemble matters.